Friends

JoeyBy the way, before I forget: To work in soap operas some of you are going to have to become much more attractive.

ChandlerListen, you are one of my favorite people and the most beautiful woman I've ever known in real life.

ChandlerJoe, I got to ask. The girl from the Xerox place, buck naked or a big tub of jam?

RossHello! You look great!

JaniceSo I hear you hate me!

JaniceA little birdie told me something about you wanting to rip your arm off and throw it at me.

RossYou're telling me about your mom? What is the matter with you?

RossI said "share", not "scare"!

MonicaNo. See, in my bedroom I set my clock six minutes fast. Want to know why?

JoeyMr.Beatty comes up to me and he says, "Good actor. Bad kisser." Can you believe that? Me, not a good kisser. That's like Mother Teresa, not a good mother.

RachelHey.

ChandlerCouldn't we just lose our virginities again? You know, because I think actually mine's growing back.

ChandlerI'm gonna hold him a different way.

PhoebeYou should go outside and be with the three-dimensional people.

RachelHoney? That's okay.

PhoebeHa. If we were in prison, you guys would be, like, my bitches.

JoeyAll these women and nothing. I feel like Superman without my powers, you know? I have the cape, and yet i cannot fly.

ChandlerOh, I know, this must be so hard. Oh, no, two woman love me. They are both gorgeous and sexy. My wallet is too small for my fifties and my diamond shoes are too tight.

JoeyRoss, listen. I got two words for you: Threesome.

PhoebeHow come you're watching a rabbi play electric guitar?

RossYou're over me? When were you under me???