The funniest Silicon Valley quotes, GIFs and memes, starring Erlich Bachman, Dinesh Chugtai, Jared Dunn and Richard Hendricks. 45 gags, voted by fans: Hot shows the most upvoted, Fresh the newest, Top 10 the best-of lists.
-
This guy fucks.
JaredThis guy fucks. -
Anal dilation aside
ErlichAnal dilation aside. What do you think of our case? -
It's about friendship
JaredThen I'll go find some hoes to prioritize behind you.ErlichAre you trying to say "Bros before hoes"?JaredIt's sexist, but it's about friendship. -
Me neither
GavinI don't know about you people, but I don't wanna live in a world where someone else makes the world a better place better than we do. -
I think he was spot on. What do yo think?
JaredMy uncle used to say, "You look like someone starved a virgin to death." -
It's about friendship
Jared"Bros before hoes". It's sexist, but it's about friendship. -
What kind of monster
ErlichWhat kind of monster puts artisanal butter in the freezer? -
I'm out of my relationship
DineshI'm out of my relationship.BertramYou raided out your girlfriend to the FBI to break up with her?DineshI'll never tell, but yes I did. -
Jobs was a poser
RichardI mean, Jobs was a poser. He didn't even write code.s -
Your whole life you've been an ugly chick
ErlichLet me explain something to you. Your whole life you've been an ugly chick but now suddenly you're a hot chick, with big tits and small nipples. So guys like that are gonna keep coming around. Don't be a slut, Richard.RichardI don't. -
Oh Big head…
ArthurSo, you moved the swimming pool?NelsonYeah, it just felt like it was way too far from the house, like, crazy far. So I had this company come and just move it closer.ArthurBut then you moved it back?NelsonYeah, turns out the guy who built this place knew exactly what he was doing. -
Is this Windows Vista bad?
GavinIs this Windows Vista bad? It's not IPhone 4 bad...is it? Don't tell me this is Zune bad...MaggieI'm sorry Gavin. It's Apple Maps bad. -
Savage
DoctorI would tell you not to have sex before then, but lets face it. Lightning ain't gonna strike twice, is it?RichardIt's possible.DoctorNo!!! -
Pornography accounts for 27 percent of all internet...
JaredPornography accounts for 27 percent of all internet usage.Erlich28 when I'm on it. -
Just check my computer
ErlichI'm not a racist. I watch a lot of black porn. -
He wouldn't come after me personally
DineshI thought I'd have to, like, answer to Congress or something.BertramYeah, that makes sense. You were worried sick about the wrath of a bloated and inept bureaucracy, but feel totally comfortable having crossed a spiteful and vindictive megalomaniac with unlmited funds.DineshShut up. Gavin wouldn't come after me personally.BertramI think you might be the first Pakistani man to be killed by a drone inside the United States. -
There's something called mansplaining.
ErlichThere's something called mansplaining. Have you heard about this?MonicaWe know what mansplaining is.ErlichMansplaining is when a man, condescendingly explains something to a woman, that she already knows. -
Hey Bro
DineshI just donated $5,000 to my cousins Wajeed's Kickstarter campaign. He's trying to get an app called...Bro off the ground.JaredBro? It's a messaging app that lets you send the word "Bro".BertramSo, it's exactly like the "Yo" app.DineshYes, but less original.JaredOh, here it is..."Bro to Bro is a noe-bit communication messanger, "the fastest way to speak your mind."DineshAs long as what's on your mind is the word "bro". -
They always travel in groups of five
GavinThey always travel in groups of five. These programmers, there's always a tall skinny white guy, short skinny Asian guy, fat guy with a ponytail, some guy with crazy facial hair and then an East Indian guy. It's like they trade guys until they all have the right group. -
Badass Bach
ErlichYou just brought piss to a shit fight.