The funniest Abbott Elementary quotes, GIFs and memes.
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The Wild Wild West line dance
(The whole staff dances the Wild Wild West line dance in the gym.) -
Do you work here?
Hey, Ava.AvaDo you work here?For nine years!AvaDamn, this is embarrassing. For you. You should really try to stand out more. -
Jumanji? It is my favorite
JanineI'm probably gonna just go home and watch a movie.GregoryJumanji? It is my favorite.JanineSee you in the morning, Gregory. -
Dinosaurs really went extinct
Mr.I bet you believe dinosaurs really went extinct. (chuckles) -
Janine isn't funny
We were just joking.KidWhy didn't anybody laugh?'Cause Janine isn't funny. -
The mom with the Bitch tattoo
BarbaraThe parent of one of my students has a very unsavory marking across her bosom.AvaThe mom with the "Bitch" tattoo?MelissaLoved that book. Movie was meh. -
Wakanda for the day
Oh! Little Black Panther!KidWakanda Forever!Oh.Maybe just Wakanda for the day. Maybe just keep your mask on, alright? Ok. Who's next? -
We all know
So aside from Jacob, nobody knows. Nobody.(in unison) We all know. -
I love you too
GregoryCause I love you.JanineI love you too. -
Have you seen his drawings?
JanineDo not let that kid shake your confidence, okay?JanineHave you seen his drawings? They're ass. -
I can be real annoying
TariqY'all may not know this about me, but if I put my mind to it, I can be real annoying. -
Chop, chop! To the library
AvaChop, chop! To the library!JanineYeah.AvaGo help her! Damn! What if she needs to reach a book on the middle shelf? -
Don't 'ew' me
AvaHe's not my man.Mr.I certainly am not.AvaEw. What do you mean "ew"? Don't "ew" me. -
Maybe I'll keep you long term
AvaNow that that's sorted, maybe I'll keep you long term.Maybe I'll keep you long term. -
My favourite B word
BarbaraMy favourite "B" word?BarbaraBarbara.BarbaraOh! Bible.BarbaraBlessing.BarbaraBlueberries! -
Hop on my back
GregoryHop on my back.JanineGregory, I can run. Jesus. Oh okay.JanineActually, um, if I... I-I'll do the back. Yeah.GregoryHere we go. -
Ugly. They're all ugly
GregoryI love Barb.. but newborn babies are-JanineUgly. They're all ugly. That's a strong word. Accurate.JanineThat's the roughest newborn I've ever seen.AvaOh, yeah. That baby's a stunner, alright. I'm stunned. Damn.JacobTo be fair, I didn't take a good photo until I was 12, when I had a small window between acne and braces.Mr.Can't relate. Came out of the womb camera-ready. Unlike Barbara's ugly grandchild. -
Don't tell me what kind of day to have
JanineWell, have a great day, Ava.AvaDon't tell me what kind of day to have.AvaGetting all presumptuous and rude. -
You are different than I thought
Mr.You are different than I thought.Miss(chuckles) I get that a lot.MissBut so are you. -
Rocky Horror at my church
(Barbara, what are you doing tonight?)BarbaraI'm going to a screening of "Rocky Horror" at my church.BarbaraThey take out all the cursing.BarbaraAll the references to sex and sexuality.BarbaraIt comes in at just under 26 minutes.BarbaraAnd it is a hoot.