Veep The funniest Quotes & GIFs

EvelynAnd I want an unadorned headstone that reads simply, "Evelyn Harper: Loving wife, devoted mother."

SelinaAmy, this is like explaining gravity to a chicken.

SelinaThat's Washington D.C. for you…District of Cunts!

AmyYou are not Michael Jordan. You are a seven-foot-seven goony-looking Lithuanian who's gonna drop dead of Marfan syndrome. Get your ass in the car.

SelinaNo, no, you're not needed here, Gary. This is man's work.

SelinaCatherine, why is that your hair?

JonahImagine something small has crawled up a dead cow's ass, and that small thing actually dies itself. If that dead thing then farted out a sack of eggs but each individual egg is a smaller, rotting dead thing…that's how toxic she is. - Jonah, on Selina's approval ratings

SelinaI came in third, Amy, ok? Even the Nazis came in second.

RogerI think there's going to be a lot of surprises tonight.

JonahYou probably still get your porn from magazines.

GaryThose are Anti Suicide Windows.

AmyI've eaten hummus with a pen cap, don't tell me how i can eat.

RogerIt looks like you should only talk when someone pulls your string. And even then you just say "tickle me".

AmyRight now you're about as toxic as a urinal cake in Chernobyl.