Amy Santiago Quotes from Brooklyn Nine-Nine
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Do I look like Jake to you?
CharlesDo I look like Jake to you?AmyNo, not at all.CharlesThen why are you trying to screw me? -
Halloween is the worst.
AmyI passed a slutty tree on the way here. Who wants to have sex with a tree?ScullyWas it a maple?JakeWas it a maple? -
What makes you think I'm upset?
RosaWhat makes you think I'm upset?AmyThe giant hole you carved into the table.RosaOops. Didn't notice. There. Fixed it. -
Do you happen to know my blood type?
JakeHey, do you happen to know my blood type?AmyYeah. B positive.JakeWell, guessed wrong. Hey, Craig? -
So what do you think?
RosaSo what do you think?AmyMm, I don't love the sash. But it's fine. I'm just gonna get it.RosaWhat? That's the first one you tried on. I once saw you look at 54 different accordion folders and not buy any of them due to weak tabs.AmyI file hard. I need strong tabs. -
I'm your new commanding officer, Captain Ray Holt.
CaptainEveryone, I'm your new commanding officer, Captain Ray Holt.AmySpeech!CaptainThat was my speech.AmyShort and sweet. -
Oh my God, she's totally gonna flunk us.
AmyOh my God, she's totally gonna flunk us. I haven't gotten an F since I failed recess in second grade. "Teachers need a break too, Amy". -
Our second option is
JakeOur second option is surveillance footage of Detective Amy Santiago soliciting drugs using perfect grammar.AmyIt's not that weird to say, "May I have some cocaine?" -
The moment you realize you want to marry her.
AmyThere's a typo in this crossword! -
Everything's fine.
AmyJake, that sounded really bad, is everything okay?JakeYeah, everything's fine. I'm talking to you.