-
Don’t stare at me, Mary! -
Love the two -
I come bearing a gift -
Hey guys, quick update -
This is your father! -
If I was in a room with Hitler, Bin Laden and Toby -
Where do you even buy sheets like this? -
-
There is only one God -
I'm in no condition to drive. -
Larry is white. -
Whistle While Your Wife Works -
I excel at many things -
This is a really tough decision. Because you're both crap. -
I wish you’d jump in the oven. -
You can’t snort a line of coke -
Dancing with the prettiest girl at the prom. -
I feel like I want to murder someone, and also I want soft pretzels. -
How I recruit my friends -
Keeping Up With The Kardashians?