• Mitchell Pritchett and Cameron Tucker in Modern Family: “Oh, I-I think I got a little tipsy. Tipsy? You were like all of themad man.” I think I got a little tipsy.
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  • Phil Dunphy and Frank Dunphy in Modern Family: “Dad! What are you doing here? Are you kidding me? My grandson paints the sets for a play, and I'm...” It runs in the family!
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  • Claire Dunphy and Phil Dunphy in Modern Family: “Phil! That is a date. They're going on a date. What? He's practically my age.” What middle-aged guy would be interested in a young woman?
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  • It's okay. I'm here.
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  • Jackie Harris in The Conners: “I take my mother to services every Sunday just to remind God she's still here in case he forgot to take her.” I take my mother to services every Sunday
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  • Jackie Harris in The Conners: “And by the way, do you know how hard it is to find a single guy in his 40s with a job?! He's a damn unicorn!” And by the way
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  • Dan Conner in The Conners: “We will behave Jackie. You haven't dated anyone in, like, forever. We're not gonna mess with whatever straggling...” We will be good
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  • Jackie Harris in The Conners: “I want your opinion about Peter. I do not want you teasing him. This family has a history of chasing off all the...” I want your opinion about Peter.
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  • Jackie Harris and Becky Conner-Healy in The Conners: “I need a drink. Becky, where do you keep the hard stuff. In Becky.” I need a drink.
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  • Stanley Hudson in The Office: “The doctor said if i can't find a new Way to relate more positively to my surroundings, I'm going to die.” The doctor said
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