• Peter Griffin in Family Guy: “You know what really grinds my gears? When someone says to be ready by a certain time and at that time they...” You know what really grinds my gears?
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  • Peter Griffin in Family Guy: “When you poop in your dreams, you poop for real.” When you poop in your dreams, you poop for real.
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  • Peter Griffin and Curator in Family Guy: “Why did all the dinosaurs die out? Because you touch yourself at night.” Why did all the dinosaurs die out?
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  • Peter Griffin in Family Guy: “Well, I just can't understand any of this. Everyone in Japan is either a ten year old girl or a monster.” I just can't understand any of this
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  • Peter Griffin in Family Guy: “Love is like a fart. If you have to force it, it's probably crap.” Love is like a fart.
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  • Peter Griffin in Family Guy: “You know that Chuck Norris is so tough, that there is no chin behind his beard, it's only another fist.” Chuck Norris is so tough, that there is no chin behind his beard
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  • Peter Griffin in Family Guy: “I had such a crush on her. Until I met you, Lois. You're my silver medal.” I had such a crush on her.
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  • Lois Griffin and Stewie Griffin in Family Guy: “Sweetie, it's broccoli, it's good for you. Now open up for the airplane. Never! Damn the broccoli!” It's broccoli
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  • Peter Griffin in Family Guy: “Sorry Meg. Daddy loves ya, but Daddy also loves Star Trek, and in all fairness, Star Trek was here first.” Daddy loves ya
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  • Stewie Griffin and Brian Griffin in Family Guy: “Brian, you're home early. What happened with your date? Same thing that always happens: she was...” What happened with your date?
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